On-Writing: Find Your Warm and Fluffy Heated Towels

Wavin' atchya Let Love Glow Writer Peeps!

In my bestselling on-writing book 10 Years and 24 Hours to Indie Epublishing Success, I advise writers to find their warm and fluffy heated towels.

What do I mean by that?

Here's a peek:

FIND YOUR WARM & FLUFFY HEATED TOWELS

We’re writers.

That means we often have to deal with Julia Cameron ARTIST'S WAY style Wet-Blankets and Crazy-Makers.

In Muse Therapy Classes, I have my peeps make a list of people, the people who make their writing process complete hell.

Well...pour yourself a cup of coffee or better yet, a strong martini. Then devour a piece of your favorite chocolate. And make your own list of who makes your writing and publishing process complete hell.

Go ahead...I’ll wait for you...

And when you’re done, we’re going to celebrate!

That’s right...Celebrate!

You’re embarking on a crucial step to take back the throne of your writing empire!

I know what you’re thinking...stimulants like coffee, chocolate, and martinis aren’t always enough to save you from family-friend-generated insanity.

Don’t feel guilty about your feelings. Even in the 1600’s writers had issues in this arena.

Here’s an example from Anne Shaw:

“Fond as we are of our loved ones, there comes at times during their absence an unexplained peace.”

Or how about this George Burns classic:

“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.”

But George didn’t know my family (or yours I bet). Separate cities won’t stop the insanity either!

Let me give you an example of how madness evolves in my life. (Note: Time for a disclaimer...I love my family. I really do. But they just don’t get me...at all.) It’s not easy to balance my sanity and writing goals with their demands and doubt demons. They have no clue what we endure and “do” as writers in the midst of their chaos. I don’t know how they think I get four-hundred pages written for each new manuscript, but they do think I should be available whenever they need me since “all I do is sit at home and write”.

Sound familiar?

And I’ll let you in on a little secret...

I have no patience.

NONE!

But let me just say...that’s, in part, an inherited trait! ;)

So here’s what my daily saga used to look and feel like:

I’m writing away and have been since 3 AM. It’s around 7:30 AM, and my phone rings with my mom’s number on my caller ID. Shit. I debate whether I should answer. But I know she’ll call my cell next then my home number again. I should just head-off the storm now. I answer. She asked me if I’m writing. I say yes. She says “well take a break and turn on QVC...you’ve got to see the TSV.” (TSV = Today’s Special Value for you non-QVC nuts. And yes, I do enjoy QVC too but only when I want to watch it and make the time to tune-in.)

I try to be the relatively sweet gal I am and explain “I’m working right now, Mom, but will check the TSV later”. That pisses her off and we’re soon on the “well, you can get back to your story in a minute”, and “you need to make time to get to your niece and nephews’ games”, mind you that would be a three hour plus round-trip drive during a weeknight, or “when are you coming home next...you need to come home more often”, and there’s always the “say, did I tell you about (this person) and (that person)” local gossip.

To which I’ve finally learned...just don’t answer the damn phone!!!

***Note: You can also move 1200 miles away which takes care of a bunch of it ;)

You can’t reason with this stuff!

You’ve got to suck it up and accept that these people just don’t get it and never will.

And yes, this answer sounds fabulous, right, and looks great on your screen?

But some days, yes, it’s hard to ignore both Mom and QVC!

What do I do?

I turn once more to Julia Cameron, who so aptly recognizes and gives a name to this family-friend dilemma we writers face just about every doggone day. Cameron cautions us not to be fooled when we’re searching for “creative recovery”. She knows we’re challenged by those in our lives rearing their hissing Medusa heads. We must escape and ignore their “well-placed doubt” voiced “for our own good” as they’re “our nearest and dearest” most skeptical friends. Cameron calls these people our Wet Blankets.

Her advice in dealing with Wet Blankets has served me beyond well throughout my going on eighteen years of writing-for-publication. She taught me, when challenged by naysayers to “zip my lip” and “move silently among the doubters”, to only give voice to my writing career plans and journey to my allies and to make sure I’ve named those allies accurately.

Ask yourself:

Is this person really my ally?

Identifying your allies versus your Wet Blankets is the reason I had you make your list of the people who drive you crazy during your writing journey along with the people who unconditionally support you.

Take out your lists again.

Get to know your instincts on each of the people listed.

Above all...follow your instincts.

Cameron gives a comforting analogy on how to think of and reconcile your Wet Blanket lists. She says that as artists we want to be wrapped-up in our “fluffy heated towel” supporters, not with the Wet Blanket Crazymakers who “throw cold water” on us.

Crazymakers are the people who drive you crazy by taking over your life (if you let them). The people who feed off of your energy, talent, resources, and kind and loving hearts. Wet Blankets and Crazymakers can take the form of an overbearing parent, a stubborn and/or unsupportive spouse/partner, or gossip-hungry friends. And yes, fellow writers who may pretend they’re working with and for you but who are truthfully working behind your back to bring you down.

Cameron tells us to use our “swords of steely intention” and “shields of self-determination” to keep our creative muses on their thrones reigning over their writing-for-publication kingdoms.

So here’s my Muse Therapy – D. D. Scott style – analogy:

Stay away from the do-good to your face Dorothy’s with their ruby red slippers of nastiness to others but not to you ‘cause you’re their friend and their big ass buckets of water waiting to dowse you! No more Glinda the Good Witch and her babbling bitches of both tittle-tattle gossip and how nice am I. Instead, be Elphaba, The Wicked Witch of the West. Garner your inner Alfie! Gather-up your loyal, flying monkeys and your bad ass broom then stand-up for your convictions and dreams until some publishing house – perhaps your own (if you're self-publishing) - lands on you!!!

You can find a wonderful group of flying monkeys in my ABCs of Writing and Publishing Online Classes! JOIN US TODAY!

So, c’mon, Y’All...let’s say it together now...

FIND MY WARM & FLUFFY HEATED TOWELS

Hugs Love Namaste and Happy Writing --- DD